


Fandom War Chronicles: Rise of The Guilds

by Halest0rm3



Category: Fairy Tail, Homestuck, Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Attack on Titans, But itll include a lot of popular fandoms, Dystopia, Edoras, Evil Empire, F/F, F/M, Lots of others - Freeform, Multiple Fandoms, Rebellion, like harry potter, not sure where this is going
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-15
Updated: 2014-09-15
Packaged: 2018-02-17 13:12:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2310839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Halest0rm3/pseuds/Halest0rm3
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by the Edolas arc in fairy tail....<br/>We praise the Kingdom, We serve the Kingdom, We love the Kingdom<br/>The Gods, in their infinite wisdom, gave the Kingdom magic to protect us,<br/>We praise the Kingdom, We serve the Kingdom, We love the Kingdom<br/>The people grew jealous and evil, they formed Fandoms and guilds,<br/>They stole magic from the kingdom,<br/>We praise the Kingdom, We serve the Kingdom, We love the Kingdom<br/>When the Fandoms are destroyed the golden age will come back,<br/>We praise the Kingdom, We serve the Kingdom, We love the Kingdom<br/>When the Guilds are destroyed we will have peace.<br/><i>"We Love the Kingdom" - circa 4rth year of the 23rd arc</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Fandom War Chronicles: Rise of The Guilds

“Long day Captain?” The portly receptionist notices the bags under his eyes and the tender way he holds his cup of coffee close to his chest, leaching off the energy it provides. 

“Kinda, my wife signed the divorce papers last night” He swipes his keycard and has to bend down to shuffle awkwardly through a metal detector obviously made for someone not quite as... buff.

“Oh im sorry” The receptionist brings her hands to her mouth in an old fashioned gasp of surprise.

“Don't be” He says with a wave of his hand. “Nasty old hag, I'm not even sure why I married her”

He pushes open the door into his office and takes a long drag of his coffee before reclining in his chair and lighting a cuban cigar. He'd been saving them for a special occasion, cuban imports were becoming increasingly rare since the recent hostilities. Looked like Fidel Castro did have some backbone after all. No matter, he would just have to make do once his stash ran out. 

Through the open curtains of his office he sees an intern rush up, one of those shifty eyed paranoid types, the ones they pull from Harvard to fetch coffee and send messages. A nervous stutter of a knock and the captain sighs audibly. Looks like its going to be one of those days...

“Come in” He barks and the intern all but pisses himself when he steps across the threshold with papers clutched to his chest.

“Sorry to bother you si- captain, sorry to bother you c-captain but they pulled me from my work and told me to get you, that it was a matter of utmost importance”

“Who told you to get me?”

“Uhh I don't know...” He mutters pathetically. Ugh useless piece of trash, why do they even bother with interns? Might as well hire monkeys!! “They said something about the results of the...c-corpse party experiment?”

“Oh that one!!” The Captain's good mood returns instantly. He was he one who had spearheaded the attack on Corpse Party, figured out their location, designed the attack mission. It had been completely flawless, a 100 expert guildhunters against 9 high school children.

“Lead the way” He places a hand on the interns shoulder and leaves the unlit cigar on his desk.  
*****

The soldier is a shivering bugeyed mess, an unfocused gaze snapping here and there as his fingers cross and uncross over and over again as he licks his lips nervously as he mutters to himself words too low to hear, an unintelligible buzz of insanity. 

“ghosts... help, h-help,h-help”

Caked blood ran down his face, all over his clothes, and occasionally he would tilt his head to the side and close his left eye before snapping his neck back up so hard the captain feared he would break it. 

“Soldier can you hear me? Soldier answer me!!” The captain was getting annoyed, angry even. Send this soldier to the hospital, to the psychiatric ward even, don't send a fucking lunatic to make a status report on a mission. He tossed the long empty coffee cup in the trash and turned to the nurse standing close by. “Take this guy away, I want someone else from that squad, preferably one who's not suffering from mental trauma”

He turned without waiting for her response and had his hand on the knob when her cough stopped him. 

“S-sir, Im really sorry... but h-he's, he's the only one who came back”

“What?!” The angry hiss that escapes surprises even him. 

“Th-thats what it says on the report” She stammers and he takes the report from her hands none too gently.

With each line the sense of dread in his stomach grows. 

_...mental trauma, psychosis, inability to speak... the subject had a mental check up two months ago and was declared perfectly healthy, exemplary even by the residing medic.._

_...found wandering the streets 200 miles from the operation site... does not respond to name or rank.._

_…long distace lacrima surveillance indicates that the enemy has since teleported. No evidence of bodies or guild house remain..._

100 trained guildhunters... not just trained but handpicked by me, the captain thinks as a bead of sweat rolls down his cheek. 

Against 9 guildmembers, most of them girls. 

What the hell are we up against?

*****

“So how was school today Lexi?” Mr. Barker is driving home after picking up Lexi from Chess Club and in a good mood if he may so himself. He just got a raise at work and to top it off he won a free 25$ Starbucks gift card. All in all a pretty good day. 

“Good” She's uncharacteristically quiet for a girl who talks so much that she'll occasionally forget to breathe. Mr. Barker sneaks a glance away from road to look back at her. 

“Whats's wrong Lex? You seem quiet today...”

“Dad whats a Fan-dam?” She doesn't miss the sudden tightness in her dad's grip on the wheel, how his very next words are enunciated with the care of someone handling an atomic bomb. 

“Where did you hear that word honey?” The speedometer rises above 30 where before it had been resting comfortably at 24. His eyes are fixed on the road ahead. 

“Colin was telling me about them. Apparently they can use magic, just like the Kingdom, but that can't be true can it daddy? Because in school they told us only the Kingdom knew how to use magic, that it was a gift from the gods and that’s why we should always be very very very thankful towards them so they'll keep protecting us” Her words are spilling out and out faster and faster with the ease of a tongue who hasn't had practice knowing when to stop. 

“That's true” 

“Well Colin was telling me about this one fan-dam, am I sayin it right?, he was telling me about one that his brother belonged to, he called it Heyri pot-ter. They wave sticks around and say a lot of magical words and they sound really really really awesome daddy!” Her excitement bubbles to the surface and Mr. Barker feels a wave of fear clutch his heart. 

“Honey I need you to listen to me” He pulls into the driveway of his house but stops before opening the garage. “This is very very important okay”

Lexi nods, her mouth slightly open in surprise. Her dad almost never says something is really really important. 

“I don't want you saying that word to anyone you hear? It can get you into trouble.” 

“Which word daddy? Fan-dom?”

“Yes that word, promise me you won't say it again”

“I promise, but why daddy? Why can it get me into trouble?”

Mr. Barker picks his next words very carefully. “What do you know about Magic Lex?”

“Long long ago it fell from the sky like shooting stars, and we were born when it hit the ground” She waves her hands in the air to illustrate the motions. “It was stored in la-cri-ma but nobody knew how to use it because we were just human. But one day the gods” She whispers the word gods solemly “came down and taught Master Xeno how to use it and he taught his dis- disci I don't know how to say that word yet and they became the kingdom and they protect us and care for us and make sure we're safe!!” She takes a deep gasp of air after the last word, her face red from the enthusiasm with which her words spilled unrestrained.

“Thats all true. And everybody loved the Kingdom because it was good and caring and we all lived peacfully and happily andeverybody always had what the ywanted and nobody fought. But there are always people who are selfish, and who don't care about anyone but themselves. And these people got together and stole magic from the kingdom and twisted it to their own selfish purposes. These people formed guilds, or fandoms, and they hate the kingdom and everybody in it. If they ever won against the kingdom they would probably just massacre us all!!” 

Lexi gasps at that. “ Really??? But that's not going to happen is it daddy?”

“No of course not honey, the kingdom is all-powerful and soon they'll take care of those treachorous fandoms but until then promise me you'll have nothing to do with any of this.”

“I promise Daddy”

“One more thing. This Colin kid, is he the one who lives across the street?”

“Yeeeep why?”

“Oh no reason just curious” Mr. Barker opens the garage. “Go on ahead I need to make a quick phone call”

Her blonde pigtails jump in the wind as she skips inside the house. Mr. Barker opens up his phone and dials 666 before placing it up against his ears. 

_“ Civilian Safety Corps this is Amanda how may I help you?”_  
“Thank you, I know of a potential... guildmember and I was wondering who I should talk to?”  
“Oh yes of course here let me send you over to that department immediately, god bless you hon you're doing the right thing” 

******

Nightvale never really liked strangers. Except for Carlos, the man with the perfect hair, but he was a totally different story and anyway this stranger was nothing like beautiful gorgeous Carlos. Strangers always tended to do stupid stuff, like think too much about the dog park, or freak out when an interdimensional wormhole swallowed up the post office, or ask questions about the dark hooded figures in the street and disappear without paying for the room they rented in the Nightvale Inn. Indeed this stranger did look like the type to cause trouble, though how that conclusion was reached is rather dubious considering his oversized cloak covered her features completely. All they could say for sure was that dog walking by the stranger was a perfectly normal, if somewhat scraggly looking, dog, and it did not seem as if the stranger was hovering which is always a good sign, except when it isn't which is rather rare. They were all pretty sure that the stranger had arrived this morning though this was fraught with a little more uncertainty since who can really say when anything happens. For all they knew the stranger could really not be a stranger at all, simply a permanent resident whose presence had been erased from everyone's memories by the management of the local radio station. 

It is also uncertain who they are, that is the people who are gossiping. One could say that it was the group of people watching him from the Nightvale Inn, drinking ale and gossiping over the latest strange and mysterious event to happen to Nightvale. Most of them are paying more attention to the giant dust cloud though, the one that keeps dropping dead armadillos in the street, so its entirely plausible that nobody in the town noticed the stranger and his perfectly normal dog. 

The stranger walks into the inn, followed by his dog, and the dog happens to be carrying not one but two dead armadillos in its mouth. Truly a normal looking dog, though who can really tell when it comes to these kind of things. The stranger is rather small though, about half the size of a hooded figure, and the cloak seems to lack any magical or otherworldly powers apart from being a worn and shabby cloak. It is with a rather anticlimatic sigh that the inhabitants of the bar lose interest in the stranger and turn back to the dust cloud outside. It seems that town hall has taken to shouting questions at the dust cloud and it is with some amusement that they see the town hall president get crushed by a dead rhyno. He should've brought an umbrella like Cecil warned everyone to in his news podcast, a reinforced one able to handle small to medium size african animals. That's what he gets for not listening to the news before going out to shout at magical dustclouds. 

“Glass of water please” He murmers under his cloak to the bartender, in a surprisingly melodic voice no less, except that he is actually a she because she pulls back the cloak over her head and pulls back long ragged black hair from her face impatiently. She's young, around 17 most likely though the scars on her face and her scowl do away with any semblance of innocence. 

“Water's turned to blood, I can get you some orange juice though” He mumbles while cleaning a dirty glass. The bartender isn't fazed by much, most Nightvaler's aren't. 

“Beer then”

“Beer tastes like rotten milk, I blame the horroterrors meself. I can get you orange juice though”

“Fine” She snaps and the weariness of a long and troubled road finally catches up to her as she places her head in her hands, the final vestiges of hope snapping in two as she finally realizes that she'll never be able to go back home. Or perhaps the bartender is simply being poetic. Perhaps she is simply tired.

She drinks Orange Juice like Genghis Khan must have practiced conquest, fierce and ferocious as she downs flask after flask after flask not even caring that orange juice is dribbling down her chin, spilling on her shirt, and her dog laps up the stray drops that fall on the floor tail wagging in contrast to his masters fervor. 

He cuts her off after the 8th flask, unfazed even when she pulls out a long steak knife to make a pretty little gash in the wood in front of her, saying that there's a strict eight serving limit on all juices and that she can drink more tomorrow if she wants. 

She calms down and its with a sudden clarity that she leans forward to whisper a question in the bartenders ear. 

“Im looking for someone... a group actually. Have you ever heard of something called... Homestuck?”

He goes in the back for a second and comes back with a high quality cuban cigar. Not a whole lot of those left, not since Cuba started resisting the kingdom. Perhaps he was in the mood for a smoke, perhaps he was avoiding a time continuum paradox by correcting an erroneous timeline, perhaps he simply wanted to make the situation more dramatic and mysterious. Who really knows why anyone does anything?

“Listen here kid” And he takes a long drag from his cigar. He starts to pour two more glasses of orange juice, one for him and one for her, ignoring his previous declaration. “Ain't nobody heard from that there Homestuck Fandom in years... They say most of them went crazy afta some freak accident or some shit with clowns. Didn't help that the Kingdom had it out for them, most dangerous Fandom in the world for a little while.” He blows an impressive smoke ring that wobbles and dissipitates into the air. “All the rules people here live with, like don't think about the dog park, don't talk to management, don't let your kids play outside when there's helicopters with complex murals of birds of prey diving, buy Big Ricco pizza once a week., none of dem Homestucks ever followed them. Rumor says that one of them, a blond fella, would...” He looks around to make sure nobody's listening and lowers his voice. “He would go into the dogpark, and rap with the hooded figures.” An involuntary shiver and the Bartender quickly forgets what he was talking about. It never pays to think too much about the dog park. He snubs the end of his cigar on the wood and tosses it to the side. “They disappeared a while ago, maybe they skipped town, maybe the kingdom captured them... who knows maybe they went too far with the hooded figures. Rumor says the ones who survived moved on, found new fandoms...”

“Where can I find them?” The desperation in her voice is painfully obvious. She'd been through too much for the trail to go cold now. 

“No idea” Her heart sinks. 

“You could go ask Old Woman Josie though, she said she met a couple wild Homestucks up North somewhere in the old forest. Said they damn near bit her face off”

She gets up at that, ripping her knife free from the wood and tossing a couple gold pieces down in one fluid motion. “Thanks for the help” and she downs the last of her juice before waving at her dog to follow her out the door. 

“Come on Crow we have work to do”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey you guys should follow my tumblr poetry blog- http://2amstuff.tumblr.com/
> 
> Also if any of you want to cowrite this fic or even take it over just leave a comment, I like this idea but I probably wont have time to continue it right now


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